posted on 27.07.14



i’m not saying anything but my absolute favorite hank videos are the



Maybe me too…when I first realized how extremely dependent on and unseparatable from culture I was, I had something of a crisis. I knew the culture that had woven itself inextricably into me was messed up and broken and terrible. 

It took me a long time…like, around 10 years, to come to terms with it, and to understand that I could let it drown me or I learn to swim…learn to appreciate it and work with in it in a way that still allowed me to be proud of myself. If I can help people through that process more quickly than it was for me, then I’m winning.

Thanks for noticing.

when people ask me about what vlogbrothers/nerdfighteria videos are about, that’s kind of what i tell them.
being human isn’t the worst thing ever. err… well it is, but it’s also the best thing.

posted on 14.06.14

for the first time in years, i am actually hitting a problem that can’t be solved through block buttons or tumblr savior or xkit.

i want to be active in the conversations surrounding the things that i care about. i want to participate and learn and help move things around and figure stuff out…

but, for the first time,
i am scared to say anything, to even ask questions. 

and that pisses me off.

it’s completely infuriating.

my tumblr experience has been largely wonderful (maybe i’m the outlier that should not be counted).

there have been some exceptions, but those were easily ignored and not super important. i admit some of what i’ve ignored has been confirmation bias at it’s finest (or worst, depending on your point of view), but i don’t come to tumblr to provoke my own anxiety and depression. i’m not stable enough to poke that shit. 

but now, when it matters, i can’t join the conversation because there are things that i don’t know, and i don’t even know where to find out before i proceed.
can’t go in ignorant, because the environment here is toxic.
being ignorant and joining the conversation here is something akin to walking into a serious gas leak knowing you don’t have a gas mask or rebreather or whatever you want to call it, and knowing there is no way back to fresh air once you’ve gone in.

i’m not in a good place, so maybe i should just step back and wait this out, see what unfolds, right?

….but i don’t want to!

and i don’t think i should have to?

like, just because you don’t know how income taxes work, doesn’t mean you get a free pass and don’t have to pay them… but what the frick

being a person is complicated, and everyone fucks up in all kinds of ways, right?

but just because someone is a fuckup, doesn’t mean they stop being a person?

if someone does something unforgivable, you cut them out of your life, as you most definitely should. great.

you make sure everyone knows what they’ve done so they can be held accountable for their actions and be treated accordingly. also great.

maybe their life tanks and they have to work through the pile of shit they’ve been standing in or avoiding. fine, they deserve it, it’s their responsibility.

but there’s this area that’s grey for me.

what then?

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posted on 23.05.14 Nerdfighteria Census 2014


Last year, around this time, John and I did a survey of Nerdfighteria and the results were fascinating Aside from discovering that you use YouTube in strange and beautiful ways, have some extremely eclectic tastes in online media, and READ LIKE BOOKS ARE MADE OF DELICIOUS MIND CORNDOGS, it was just a really cool way for this community to get to know itself better. 

So we’re doing it again! This time, it’s a little longer because, well, no one complained about how long it was last time. 


  1. You don’t have to answer all of the questions (or any of them)…100% of questions are optional.
  2. We will not sell this information, though we may share some anonymous, non-identity-linked data with our friends in the publishing industry so that they can sell more books, which is a cause we believe in.
  3. We will also make some of the data we collect public, but anything that could be tied to your identity will be removed.

If you want to see the video I made going over the census data, you can see it on hankschannel. It got a TON of views…which is really cool. I will be making another one of those. 

So, if you have some spare moments, please spend them with the 2014 Nerdfighteria Census! It should take more than ten minutes and less than half an hour, and it will help us figure out where we should stop when we go on tour and what kind of content to make in the future.

So, again, LINK!

posted on 24.11.12


Little Black Submarines - the Black Keys (yet another cover)

posted on 10.10.12

Lost souls. (by kasooie)

this kid says stuff and it is good.

[F]or other lost souls, those paper worlds will make much more sense than this one. Fictitious characters will become more real than the people they ride the bus with. They will find more truth in the lyrics of a song than in any article of the Constitution, and the verses of some book will become their law.

They won’t be able to jump into these worlds, and on some days this melancholy in their pockets will feel like it’s weighing them down, but they will never feel lonely again because they will know:

All of these stories were made for them.

posted on 27.08.12

Nerdfighteria, you are my favorite.



I had to.

I have no words.
posted on 06.08.12


I had to.

I have no words.

posted on 24.07.12

I just

I can’t get over this

that is happening

posted on 16.07.12

odetomyday said: You are REALLY good at getting the vlogbrothers to reblog you.

*publishing because you’re the third to say something along those lines and with that post over 5,000 notes you probably won’t be the last, haha.*


I don’t know if I’d quite say that, but I suspect it has something to do with the fact that my name is rather singular, and they have seen it more than once.

There was a clip once of Derren Brown or someone of that nature, and he basically showed how certain stimuli can have a suggestive effect on our brains. Like he planned out this whole trip thing for a couple of advertisers- just a simple bus/taxi ride-and then they were asked to come up with a picture and phrase to go with some advert scheme. They ended up reproducing almost exactly the picture he’d drawn beforehand (to be clear, they hadn’t seen it previously). He’d basically counted on the fact that their brains would pick up on certain images along the taxi/bus ride to the studio.

In a similar fashion, I would imagine that after seeing my name so many times, it tends to draw your eye. Even in a place like the YouTube comment sections, certain names will stand out and you’ll start remembering them. (Personally GONEmypurpleflapjack and ChrisJDArcy come to mind. I know nothing about them, but their usernames have implanted themselves in my brain. Also I’ve gotten quite a few “top comments” on YT, not really sure why, but that could be anther exposure.)

To be fair though it’s only happened twice. The reblogging I mean. John’s taken my question in a Question Tuesday (because he could make a pizza joke out of it), and they attempted to answer a different question from me at the Tour de Nerdfighting stop in Albuquerque this past January (because it was a funny question. Also John signed my name in one of his books, so another exposure there). Oh and there was one time John tweeted about a radio thing and I asked about the time and he replied. Then Ze has used a couple of my replies to his questions things on twitter, and I know they watch A Show, so there’s another way they could notice it….

Right. Okay, I’m weirding myself out now. My brain is the definition of overanalysis.

but no, seriously, pretty sure I have nothing to do with it.

just a couple very, very nice coincidences methinks!

also I tag pretty much everything, and both of them admit to following their tags on tumblr soooo… could be that too :)

especially since the things they’ve reblogged from me weren’t like, particularly amazing or insightful or whatever. just little things.

that said, every time it happens I still have a bit of a…. fit, if you will. 

posted on 11.07.12 Hi.


Um, I need a little emotional support.

Read More

posted on 05.05.12

I recorded this for Hank today.

Violin (2 parts), viola, piano, and guitar. (Yes there is a guitar in there, I don’t care if you can’t hear it.)

It came out infinitely better than my video. Because I am bad at talking.

I uploaded the video anyway. But then it died. So I made an even worse version to replace it.

But the song is kind of okay still.

Even though my mic wasn’t working either so I had to use the built-ins..

But yeah.

So I’ll just leave it here.

Happy Hanko de Mayo.

posted on 20.04.12 I just realized that the day John Green showed us the cover of TFiOS was also the day that this happened:
  • TheSaera: What's in your pockets?
  • John Green: Pizza, of course!!! What else would I put in my pockets?!

posted on 14.04.12

In which honesty is rewarded in Nerdfighteria.


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